Really!? Middle age, already!?

I don't know if it's the fact that 40 is less than a year away or that I am just paying a little more attention to my surroundings, but lately I seem to be feeling ... well, kind of older. Not octogenarian old, but I guess I am finally starting to realize that I am a lot closer to 45 than I am to 25.

Umm, when exactly did that happen anyway? Hello, middle-age nice to meet you. For some reason I thought my kids would be on their way to high school when we were first introduced, but surprise! It looks like we'll be meeting while I still have a child in kindergarten. Realistically speaking if I am going to live to the average female life expectancy for this country of 81 - I'm there. Middle age is upon me ( of course it could be much worse - the female life expectancy in Mozambique is 40 years old. At this point, if I were living there I'd have much more serious issues to worry about!)


The thing is that a lot of the other Moms in my neighborhood are right around my age, so I really never considered myself an "older" Mom. All of us are the twilight moments of our 30's or our early 40's & all of us have pre-schoolers at home. There are a few younger Moms in the neighborhood, but I guess I never really thought about the "age factor" before.

So, you can imagine my surprise a couple of weeks ago when it slapped me right across the face. I was sitting with my neighbor Lisa and a group of other Moms in the waiting area while our kids were in their swim lessons. Somehow the subject of age came up & I discovered to my surprise that most of the other Moms I was sitting with were still in their 20's. I knew they were younger, but I didn't realize how much younger they were.

Apparently the age difference came as a bit of a shock to them as well since I heard one of them exclaim to Lisa "I had no idea that you were that old!" Lisa was very gracious about it, but I was reeling a bit. Who me, old? You've gotta to be kidding right? And then I started thinking ... if I had a kid in my mid-twenties, my oldest child would be getting ready to enter high school instead of first grade. Hmm...

Then a couple days later I got another slap in the face courtesy of one my neighbors. She and her husband moved into in the house across the street about a year ago & we are glad to have them as neighbors - they are really nice people. They happen to have 2 grown boys who visit from time to time to help them out around the house.

My husband & I had thought they were probably in their early 50's based on the ages of their kids. They both work out a lot, so we just figured they just looked really awesome for their age. The other day we were talking & she looks me in the eye and asks "Just how old are you anyway, if you don't mind me asking. My husband & I were trying to figure it out."

"Oh, I replied I just turned 39 & Mr. Crackers will turn 40 in a week or so."

"I thought you guys were our age! Joe wasn't sure, but I told him that I didn't think you guys were really young. Joe & I are 43."

Thankfully, I had the presence of mind not to blurt out - Gee we thought you guys were a lot older (sometimes my social filter kicks in just in time to save me from more embarrassing and awkward moments).

"You're right! We're all about the same age - I guess we're just in different stages of life." (I'm observant like that.)

She looked at me, and then shot a look at my two hooligans and said, "So, you guys kind of had your kids late in life, huh? I mean my two boys are 21 and 24. How old are your kids again?"

"Umm, well they're 6 and 3". I replied in my calmest voice.

"Wow! Well, I'm sure that being an older Mom you have a lot more patience than I did with my kids. I mean I was so young, I didn't know what I was doing. You've got maturity on your side (well, I guess that's one way of saying it) I mean, now mine are finally grown & living on their own. Joe & I are having the time of our lives."

"Oh, that's great. Yeah, Mr. Crackers & I didn't get married until our late 20's & then we were having fun just being a couple, so we waited awhile before having kids. I guess we're a little behind you on the whole life-stage thing, but we'll be joining you guys in about ...... umm 17 years or so (gulp)."

Dagnabit! Where did all those years go? If the last 6 years are any indication, I need to hold onto my hat because these next 17 years are going to fly right by. Before I know it I'll be looking around & realizing that I'm closer to 60 than 40!

Oh well -- Looking back on it, I realize that I wouldn't change a thing about the course my life has taken. I enjoyed my footloose and fancy-free 20's and have loved my family life and everything else that has blessed my 30's. Even though I may be doing things later than some people, I'm having the time of my life. I think someone once said it's not the destination but the journey (or something like that). So far it's been a pretty terrific ride.





**UPDATE: Since I am actually on the computer I figured I should probably do some internet research on the quote I was talking about above. The actual quote I was referring to (I think) was:

"The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination.” Don Williams, Jr. (American Novelist and Poet, b.1968)

I still agree... and I've loved the journey so far!